Here is a popular Middle East story that is good to remember as you negotiate. I first heard the story years ago from Harvard negotiator William Ury.
A man died and left his herd of 17 camels to his three sons as an inheritance to them. In his will, he said his first son should get half of the camels, his middle son should get a third of the camels, and his youngest son should get a ninth of the camels.
But 17 doesn’t divide by two, or by three, or by nine. This difficulty drags the brothers into an intense negotiation in which tempers began to be strained and flared. Desperate and unable to solve their problem, they consult a wise older woman. After listening to them carefully, the woman decided to donate his camel to them. Now with eighteen camels, the first son takes half of eighteen or nine camels; the middle son takes a third eighteen or six camels; the youngest son takes a ninth of eighteen, which is two camels.
9 + 6 + 2 = 17
They have one camel left over, which they take back to the wise woman.
All along, the brothers had everything they need to solve their problem in a way that leaves everybody satisfied. However, they simply couldn’t see it. Instead, distrust built, and tempers were strained. And they couldn’t see what was in front of them.
A lot of conflicts today are like the conflict between the three brothers and the 17 camels. At first, they seem impossible to resolve. No one can see an apparent solution. Yet, with a wise perspective, we can find a way to solve our problems and satisfy all the interests.
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